that time of the month
The feeling I have is pretty silly right now. I haven't posted in a while, and I kind of feel overwhelmed with the stuff that I could put in here. I also am wary of making a long and boring post. But nothing I have to say is exciting or important, so I am not concerned about that. And MUTM has been really poor for a while now, so anything might help. I don't know, I just feel aprehensive about the whole thing. Oh well.
First, a bit about MUTM. I don't know about anyone else, but I check it daily, and a lot of days I check it more than that. Somehow, after days of nothing new, I think that maybe it will be updated with something exciting. But I am almost always let down. Podcasting is great and all, but the response seems rather poor and it bores me.
Second. I don't know about anyone else, but my bed eats things and then vomits them later in the night. Every night I lose at least two things. One is the remote to my ipod speaker thing. The other is my bookmark. The bookmark is nothing special, just a bit of paper to mark my place. But almost every night I have to get a new one, and that means finding something small enough to fit in a book and not be absurd but also big enough to be accessible. I must have 87 pieces of torn paper bookmarks around and under my bed.(How they get under is beyond me. If they fall of the side, they must catch a breeze and fly under. Or maybe they land on the ground and go for a walk. I don't know.) My book reading ritual is pretty simple. I pick up a book, lay my body down, put covers over my body, open my book and almost at the same time pull my bookmark from the top and place it on my bed. Seconds, and I do not exaggerate, seconds later, it is gone. Sometimes I get mad and tear my bed up looking for it. But I never find it. Until the morning, when it winds up on my face like a lover. AND THIS HAPPENS SO OFTEN YOU WOULDN'T BELIEVE. As I said before, I also lose my remote. And it's pretty much the same thing, except it usually winds up by my feet. Then I kick it, and I get scared that there is a creature in my bed because the remote is cold. Again, somehow it moves from where I put it down to the feet part of my bed. I thought that there might have been a conveyor belt or a suction channel built into my sheets, but when I switched positions and put my head where my feet go, it still went to the feet part. But tonight takes the cake. Since I switched positions I started putting my phone on the box spring. The other way I could put it on the other side of my bed and it wouldn't be interfered with, but this new way I seem to punch it off my bed a lot. So I moved my matress over and made a shelf with the box spring. My phone is my alarm and that is why it needs to be by my head. Anyway, this morning my mom wakes me up before my alarm goes off, and I pick up my phone to see what time it is. And I ask my mom what she wants, she says I have to weedwack, and I look at the phone again to make sure that it is indeed 9 in the morning on my sleep-in-saturday. And I get up, and put my phone on my bed as I am standing up. Throughout the day I go in my room to look for my phone and repeatedly find nothing. Not under my bed, not under my pillow, not in my sheets. Tonight, at about 1.00 I get home from the movies and I decide to call my phone because I have had enough of this hide and seek business. And I hear it vibrate. It's on my bed. I can't find it. I call again, and its under my pillow. I lift my pillow, its not there. I call again, and it is INSIDE MY PILLOWCASE. At the very base-seam part. Somedays you feel like you are on candid camera, and this was one of those days.
I had more stuff, but it's too long as it is. I don't even feel like checking for grammatical correctness, or spelling. I can't believe I wrote all that about losing stuff in my bed
Oh. I just decided to ask this question. If you could sing one song and only one song well, (for your personal enjoyment, not financial future) what song would it be? My song would be Danke Schoen. And I would sing it as a young wayne newton.
3 Comments:
I can honestly say that I can relate on a personal level with your rant on losing stuff in bed, more than any other work of literature I have ever read. I also have scraps of paper littering my bedside. I find myself ripping important things like the book itself I'm reading, or a lease that happens to be nearby, just because I know I can't remember the page number. I have also done the box spring shelf, it really is quite nice.
There's also the whole experience of sleeping with your laptop. The apprehension of knocking it off the bed (like a lover), combined with her clingy tendencies of wrapping her cord around your body and sticking the power block under your cheek so you awake frantically from a dream about burning alive.
sarah, lisa hannigan is hot.
i have bed problems too, but they don't involve losing things. MY SHEETS AND COMFORTER DRIVE ME CRAZY! but its not just this set, it's any set. i have a real problem with sleeping on a bed with uneven amounts of sheets and/or comforter hanging off the sides. i always check to make sure they are centered on the bed before i lay down, but I usually have a hard time falling asleep because i can FEEL the sheets being uneven on the sides. when this happens, i try to adjust them by lifting with my legs and pulling it to one side or the other, but THEN one or the other is still uneven. then i have a huge problem on my hands... i have 1 straight and one lopsided. thats when i get out of bed, remake it, and crawl back into bed and try to fall asleep without moving. now this is just my problem with the latitudinal postion. theres ALSO a longitudinal problem that basically occurs during the adjustment of the previous problem. when im trying to sort out my sheets, i pull them up too close to my face while im trying to adjust, so then the sheet and/or comforter is bunched up around my face like a turtleneck. when i try to pull them down with my feet, one of them moves and the other stays there, resulting in a variation of the other problem. the whole this is really a process that takes patience to solve. i think i might have OCD.
if i had to choose a song, it would be "my loveship needs some fuel" by the step sisterz
Evan,
i find your pleasure to write all this down incredible. you have what i have now lost when it comes to blogging. it's awesome how when you post, people who never come around show up for you. nice work. You should definitely be saving all these posts on your computer. They might come in handy one day.
i would sing "Dancing in September" by Earth, Wind, and Fire. I love that song.
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